Forever and Always
by Merlyn's angel
Summary: An angsty B/A story I wrote it a awhile ago.


Forever and Always  
  
By Merlyns Angel  
  
"Buffy," The cry echoed around the room as Angel shot up in bed. He looked blindly around the room still half enclosed in the dream searching for his beloved's face. As the room began to come into focus the shaking which had racked his body slowed and then stopped. A quiet knock sounded at the door; "Angel are you O.K.?" the question came uncertainly through the door in Cordelia's voice.  
  
Angel looked at the door and started to get out of bed calling "I'm fine, Cordelia." Even as he spoke the legs which had been weakly holding him up, abruptly collapsed beneath him and he fell to the floor with a crash. He winced realizing what the crash would sound like on the other side of the door.  
  
"You are not fine," Cordelia's voice sounded through the door, "I'm coming in." A loud rattle of the doorknob made her threat real. The sound had the panic racing through Angel's body again. This was how the dream had started! "Cordelia, wait!" Panic tinged his words as he jumped up off the floor and hurried to the door pulling on his clothes as he moved.  
  
He flung open the door and found himself face t face with Cordelia and Wesley who peered back at him worriedly.  
  
"Cordelia, do me a favor. Call Giles and ask if Buffy's O.K." Angel demanded impatiently moving towards the staircase and the front lobby downstairs. "Angel! Angel Wait a minute!" Wesley sputtered racing after him. "Why is Cordelia calling Giles?" he asked confused as he grabbed Angel's arm to stall him.  
  
"Don't ask, Wesley, please just do it." Angel began quickly moving again with Wesley immediately behind and Cordelia bringing up the rear.  
  
"Angel what is going on?" Cordelia questioned yet again trying to work through the situation.  
  
Angel spared a glance as the landed on the first floor as he headed to the offices hidden behind the front desk. "I had a dream last night," he muttered self-consciously.  
  
"A dream?" Cordelia scorned. "Angel calling Giles to check on Buffy because of a dream is crazy."  
  
Wesley watched Angel's face tighten and his body stiffen "Cordelia maybe this isn't…." he began  
  
"Oh Right, Wesley…." Cordelia interrupted.  
  
The fight heating up was between them was abruptly stopped by the relaxing of Angel's body and his weary words, "She's right, Wesley."  
  
Wesley and Cordelia looked back at him blankly and uttered "UH?!"  
  
Angel looked at them and sighed, "She's right," he repeated his eyes and posture weary. "It was a dream," he continued, but it was so real. It was scary and in it" he suddenly stopped, "in it Buffy…"the last was stated flatly, "died."  
  
Cordelia looked slightly shaken but then she shrugged "Oh O.K., but this wasn't like a prophecy dream was it?" she asked.  
  
"Yes, no-I'm not sure." The pain in his eyes faded to be replaces by annoyance and frustration. "Could you two just call Giles and make sure it wasn't real, O.K.?"  
  
"Sure," Wesley said and he walked over and picked up the phone from the front desk. He punched in the number watching Angel intently as he paced around the room.  
  
"Mr. Giles?" Wesley asked into the phone when the other extension was picked up. There was a pause and then "I'm fine and so is everyone here." He glanced at Angel again and then asked "How about everyone in Sunnydale? Buffy? Willow? Xander?" There was another pause and then, "Everyone's good. That's great news." He listened to the other end of the line a minute more then said, "Oh no reason special just thought it was time to call and catch up. "The two conversed for a minute or two longer then Wesley was hanging up the phone and turning to Angel, "Buffy's fine. She had a relatively quiet night on patrol and right now she's in class."  
  
Angel relaxed and exhaled slowly. "That's great. Thank you, Wesley."  
  
"Now can we please get some work done," Cordelia grumbled. The two men looked at her in surprise and then burst out laughing, "Whatever you want, Cordelia" Angel said on another wave of laughter.  
  
******************************************************************  
  
They passed the rest of the day in relative ease, no monsters, no blinding headache, and no run-ins with Wolfram and Hart. As night came closer restlessness began to plague Angel. He began to pace around the room lost in his thoughts paying no attention to the other occupants of the room. After several thwarted attempts to draw him into conversation Cordelia and Wesley left him to those thoughts. They watched with concern as he flung himself into a chair with one breath and then he bounced up in another to pace again. Concern turned to panic as they watched him pace to the window and move the curtain to the side in agitation and through a tiny hole in the fabric of the curtain they spotted the remains of the sun still in the sky. "Angel!" they yelled in unison.  
  
"What?" he growled back annoyed at the intrusion. In a sudden movement he whirled around to look at them yanking the curtain and letting the in a stream of late day sunlight. "Damn!" he yelled as the sun spilled over his hand sending pain shooting up arm, forcing him to release the curtain. He turned to find his colleagues looking at him with concern.  
  
He glanced down at his knuckles; already the skin was turning bright pink and was beginning to throb. Glancing back at Cordelia and Wesley again he smiled, "Oops!"  
  
"Oh for God's sake" Cordelia huffed exploding from her seat. She grabbed Angel's hand and dragged him into the bathroom to run his hand under the cold water.  
  
As soon as the cold water hit his injured hand Angel flinched and jerked his hand back. "Hold still," Cordelia muttered, "Honestly, Angel, what were you thinking? You had to know the sun wasn't down yet." She glanced at him briefly out of the corner of her eye in silent question and then reached over to turn the tap off.  
  
Letting his hand lay passively hers while she tried it, Angel answered, "I wasn't thinking about it," he paused then finished, "I had something else on my mind." The last part of the sentence was said in a rush as if he was embarrassed by those other thoughts.  
  
Cordelia looked down again to inspect his hand, "The redness has gone away, but I wouldn't suggest sticking in the sunlight for awhile." She stared at him for a minute before nodding her head. "If that dream is bothering you so much why don't you go to Sunnydale and check on her in person?"  
  
Angel shook his head in immediate denial; " No I don't want her to think I'm checking up on her."  
  
"Angel isn't sitting here and obsessing, and calling Giles to ask if she's O.K. checking up on her?" Cordelia asked watching him closely.  
  
Angel looked uncomfortable. " Yes, I mean no." Unable to form an answer he settles for glaring at her darkly. Then he shrugged. "It's just that the closer it gets to nightfall…." He trailed off shrugging helplessly again.  
  
Cordelia snorted. "What? The more you feel like the worlds gonna end?" She looked at him in disbelief. Then not really expecting an answer she said; " I don't know what's going on with you but I do know you are driving me crazy and," she continued imperiously when he opened his mouth t defend himself, "I think you should go to Sunnydale." As she spoke she began t push him out of the bathroom and in the lobby where Wesley waited patiently watching their approach.  
  
"I think she's right, Angel," he said overhearing the last of Cordelia's tirade. "And," he continued oblivious to the shock looks he received, "What's more I think Cordelia and I shall accompany you."  
  
Cordelia gaped at him and sputtered "What?"  
  
"We should all go" Wesley repeated as Cordelia the shock wearing off to glare at him with homicidal intent.  
  
"Oh. No. We. Should. Not." Cordelia argued. Her slow repetition of his statement gave testament to her feelings.  
  
Angel felt amusement warring with the tension inside of him. Nothing earth shattering was going to happen if these two could still bicker. He cleared his throat. "Uh guys," he called to get their attention. "You don't have to come with me." Because the idea of returning to Sunnydale with him annoyed Cordelia so much he used his most adorable puppy dog look and added. " But I really appreciate the fact that you care enough to want to come with me."  
  
Cordelia's expression changed from enraged to that one of a deer caught in a headlight look as she quickly tried to formulate an answer. When none appeared she sighed grudgingly and muttered, "Come on, Wesley, lets get in the car we're wasting time." Attempting to look on the positive side she continued, "you know it might be nice to see everyone or at least Willow, Giles and Xander." With a last glance at Angel she grabbed her purse and sailed out the door Wesley held open. He followed her out the door leaving Angel to grab his keys and hurry out the door and pulling it closed behind him.  
  
Arriving at the car they found Cordelia seated in the passenger seat talking to Gunn. "Hey, " he said as the two other men approached, "Cordelia was just filling me in on your trip. Do you think you're going to see any action? Want me to come along? I haven't gotten my nightly staking in yet."  
  
Cordelia rolled her eyes and only catching part of the longest speech that Gunn had ever uttered said, "He certainly thinks we will," pointing a finger at Angel, "as for me I'm not so sure." She turned her head to smirk at Angel as Gunn shifted his attention in that direction.  
  
"Sure. Yeah. Come on," Angel said absently ushering Gunn and Wesley into the backseat. He climbed into the front seat and slammed the door shut. Hurriedly putting the key in the ignition and started the car with a jerk off his hand. Throwing the car into reverse he peeled out of the parking spot.  
  
Roaring out the parking lot and onto the highway Angel began to feel a return of the earlier panic. Something wasn't right he could feel it straight through to his bones. Somewhere deep inside it felt as if he had done this before. As if every move he had made so far that night had already been done and the results had been heartbreaking and tragic. Trying to out race his feelings he let the speedometer hover at ninety and sped to Sunnydale.  
  
Courtesy of the open top the wind whipped Cordelia's hair in her face for the third time in as many minutes. Pushing the hair out of her face yet again and securing it with her hand she cast a baleful glance at Angel's quiet form in the seat next to her. In that one glance she saw that rather ten alleviate his tension, this trip was actually increasing it. Something was definitely wrong, she thought to herself feeling a little unnerved. Hoping to hide Angel's increased agitation from Wesley and most especially Gunn she turned in her seat to chatter with them aimlessly. It was especially important that Gunn not find out. Rough and always ready to rumble he was more single minded about slaying then Buffy.  
  
Cordelia shifted a little in her seat at the thought of Buffy and the end that she met in Angel's dream. Although she and Buffy had never gotten along she certainly did not wish her dead. More importantly she hoped that Angel's dream wasn't a prophecy dream. She hated to think what it would do to Angel is something happened to Buffy.  
  
The conversation flowed around Angel as the miles between Los Angeles and Sunnydale lessened. The eerie sense of déjà vu plagued him relentlessly. The closer to Sunnydale came the more his feelings began to change from panic to terror. Deep inside he knew that after tonight his life would never be the same. The darkness of the night reminded him of his dream from the night before. With a flash the dream filtered through his mind. The same late night race to Sunnydale, upon arrival the desperate race through the cemetery in search of Buffy, and then finally the shock and terror of seeing Buffy lying in a pool of her won blood. The sound of her harsh breathing and whispered words echoed through his head. And then a cough, a sigh and she was gone. Unconsciously he gripped the steering wheel and punched the accelerator causing the car to jerk into the next gear.  
  
"Angel," Cordelia yelled sharply over the wind. Angel jerked out of his thought and consciously pulled his foot off the accelerator and then glanced at Cordelia a second before returning his eyes to the wheel. "Yes," he asked as though nothing has happened. In direct contrast his neutral tone his hand remained clenched around the steering wheel.  
  
"Nothing," she sighed and turned back to Wesley and Gunn.  
  
Wesley and Gunn had also felt the jerk of the car and the absence of Angel from any conversation. Gunn contributed the tension coming from Angel to the upcoming battle and ignored the jerk returning to his conversation with Cordelia. Wesley, however, knowing the more serious reasons for Angel's tension opened his mouth to comment. A sharp shake of Cordelia's head stalled it. He returned the conversation keeping all the while keeping a wary eye on Angel.  
  
They passed the Welcome To Sunnydale sign and minutes later they approached the nearest cemetery, Eastside Cemetery the one from Angel's dream. Guided by a small instinct inside and the lingering remnants of the dream Angel immediately stopped the car and jumped out. Over his shoulder he yelled for the others to go and find Giles and the rest of the Scooby gang. Cordelia jumped in the driver's seat as Gunn followed out of the car and into the cemetery. "Gunn, damn it!" Cordelia yelled. "Get back here."  
  
"Just find help," he called back over his shoulder never breaking his stride.  
  
"Find help. Find help," Cordelia muttered throwing the car into drive and speeding down the street towards Giles's apartment. "Is that all I'm good for?" She glared as Wesley before he could answer. "Don't think about answering that."  
  
Wesley closed his mouth and kept it that way, Seconds later, Cordelia pulled up near Giles's apartment complex, hit the brakes and slammed the car into park. She jumped out of the car and ran to his front door. Pounding on it she yelled his name "Giles."  
  
Annoyed by the intrusion a neighbor opened her door and yelled out the door, "Child, stop. He's not there. He's at the Magic Box, his store."  
  
Heart pounding at the unexpected voice, Cordelia whirled around. "Store? What store?" she asked.  
  
The lady shook her head, "Why his magic store."  
  
Cordelia stopped short as she remembered that Giles had recently acquired The Magic Box after its previous owner's untimely demise. "Do you have that number?" she asked.  
  
"Not right off. No. Do you want me to look it up for you?" she asked slowly. Cordelia started to answer in the affirmative when a sudden fiery ache screamed through her temples and then spilled over her entire head knocking to her knees. "Oh God!" she screamed. The flashes an interrupted movie appeared before her tightly closed eyes. Angel, Buffy and Gunn fighting. Buffy flying through the air. Angel and Gunn killing the ugliest demon she had ever seen. Buffy and Angel whispering and then finally Angel's blank face. The last image haunted her as she gingerly opened her eyes and stared into the Wesley's concerned face. Giles's neighbor had disappeared into her house and returned seconds later with a glass of water. "Here," Wesley said taking the glass from the women and handing Cordelia it and two pain relievers. "She's going to die. Oh Wesley, she's going to die and there's nothing we can do about it." Cordelia studied him with pain filled eyes, her heart breaking inside her chest for not only Buffy's death but also for the pain Angel would feel. Wesley paled and pulled her to her feet. The two started back towards the car with Cordelia calling over her shoulder. "Thanks for the water and I'll call information for the Magic Box number."  
  
The lady shrugged and returned to her house all the wile that ever since that nice Mr. Giles had moved in the place had gotten very weird.  
  
Getting in the car, Cordelia quickly grabbed the cell phone and punched in the information number. Giving the operator the appropriate information she requested the number for the Magic Box at the same time throwing the car into reverse. She peeled out of the parking place at the same time the operator achieved her number. Hitting the button to automatically connect her call. Cordelia turned the car around down the road leading to the cemetery. It was then Wesley felt the need to speak up, "Angel said for us to get the others not call them and go back."  
  
Cordelia spared him a glance. "I know what I saw, Wesley, he needs us." At the look the disbelieving look on Wesley's face she continued, "I saw her death, Wes, and I saw his reaction. I don't think we're going to prevent the inevitable now." The pain flashed in her eyes and her voice choked as in her ear a distinguished voice said "Hello Magic Box?"  
  
"Giles? Giles it's me Cordelia."  
  
"Cordelia, How are you?" Giles answered sounding slightly surprised by both her call and her tone. "Giles, listen to me where's Buffy?" she asked impatiently hoping against hope that her vision and Angel's gut were wrong.  
  
"Cordelia really I-" Giles started but she broke in with. "Giles please I don't have time for this. Where is she?" Cordelia asked.  
  
"She's patrolling in Eastside cemetery," His answer was brisk as if responding to the tone of hers. The answer came just as Cordelia pulled up in front of the cemetery. Jumping out of the car she said into the phone, "Giles, round everyone up and meet Wesley and I there."  
  
"Wait, Cordelia, meet you there? What are you talking about?" Giles sputtered for a minute and then "O.K. we'll be there in a few minutes."  
  
"Hurry up, Giles, I'm not sure we have a few minutes." Cordelia said desperately, breaking the connection she shoved the phone into her pocket and she and Wesley raced through the cemetery in search of her friends.  
  
  
  
Meanwhile at the Magic Box, Giles listened to the phone disconnect and then hanging up his extension he turned to face the expectant faces of the other occupants of the room. Willow, Xander, Anya, Tara and Spike looked at him with varying degrees of curiosity and disinterest. As he opened his mouth to answer their questions, he felt a chill run up his spine and after years of learning to listen to those very feelings he responded, 'That was Cordelia. She wants us to meet her at the Eastside Cemetery. It sounded urgent." Responding to the briskness and authority in his tone, the group moved as one to the door and then out it and to his car. Giles was the last one out and he locked the door behind them before climbing into the car and gunning the engine. Backing out of the parking space he sped off in the direction of the cemetery. Minutes later he was pulling up behind Angel's convertible. Piling out of the car the group rushed towards the cemetery entrance when out of the darkness an agonized cry echoed "Buffy!" As one the Scooby gang ran towards the sound.  
  
Cordelia and Wesley ran frantically through the cemetery each of them praying their friends were all right. They were just reaching the clearing where the older section of the cemetery resided, where Cordelia's vision said that there friends would be, when Angel's heartbroken cry pierced the night "Buffy!" Moving quickly towards the sound that froze at the taboo which lay before them.  
  
Angel and Gunn raced through the darkness Angel's sense of smell leading him towards Buffy. They found her fighting the ugliest demon Gunn had ever seen. Raising his axe Gunn jumped into the fray with Angel on his heels. Sensing their arrival, Buffy spared Angel a glance. "Hey. What happened you get bore in LA?" The sarcastic ton and smirking half smile helped ease the tension pooling in Angel's stomach. It also helped him ignore the blood running a scarlet path down her arm.  
  
He chuckled dryly. "Something like that."  
  
At the sound of Angel's laugh Gunn glanced over and the demon took the opportunity to give him a solid hit on the back the sent him flying.  
  
"So who's your friend?" Buffy asked as she executed a running kick to the demon's stomach. She bounced off and landed on her back with a grunt.  
  
"Gunn. How about we have the formal introductions for later and fight this demon." With that thought in mind he leaped at the demon only to hit the ground hard.  
  
"Sounds like a plan," Buffy huffed out as she hit the ground yet again.  
  
Turning their full attention the demon Buffy, Angel, and Gunn (who had regained his feet and was brandishing his axe) began to circle and study their opponent. Well over six feet it stood on two legs with very strong arms that had claws on the end. An eerie orange color it had ooze dripping from its body. It's tail stretched back into the darkness an it was lined with spikes any time one of the three came close to it the demon would strike out immediately. The demon's only noise was a gurgling growl.  
  
Following Buffy's lead Angel and Gunn attacked as one and kept up the assault in order to wear the demon out. Within minutes the demon was on his knees. Buffy and Angel were trying to think of the best way to finish it of when from out of nowhere the demon's tail came from behind and hit Buffy, tossing her into the air. She landed with a sickening thud on the ground near Gunn's feet. Seeking to gain an advantage the demon charged Angel, who grabbed Gunn's axe and with an agonized glance at Buffy he raced forward and sliced its tail off, killing it immediately.  
  
Dropping the axe to the ground Angel turned and raced to Buffy. Gathering her into his arms he looked searchingly at Gunn. Gunn had been trying to stem the blood flowing from the numerous cuts the demon's spiked tail had inflicted upon her answered unspoken plea with a despondent shake of his head and lowering of his eyes. Angel accepted the inevitable by briefly closing his eyes. Numbing himself to the pain that raced through him and the feel of Buffy's blood soaking his arms he concentrated on her eyes and the words she was trying to speak through her labored breathing. Gunn moved away to give them a little privacy.  
  
"Angel we don't have a lot of time," she said each word a struggle.  
  
"Hey, you just hang in there. You're gonna be just fine. Super human healing remember," Angel reassured with a weak smile pushing his heartbreak deep inside.  
  
Buffy sighed "Angel, promise me you'll look after everyone. Especially my mom ad Dawn."  
  
Angel swallowed hard and tried to smile again. "Buffy you need to stop talking like this you are going to be-"  
  
Buffy grabbed his shirt and shook him with all her dwindling strength." Angel. Promise. Me." She gasped.  
  
"Sh, Sh, all right." He soothed.  
  
Buffy relaxed in his arms so quickly that Angel panicked. "Buffy," he whispered shuddering slightly. He was shocked at how fragile se felt in his arms. Her lids fluttered open to reveal blue eyes almost black with pain. "Time getting shorter and there's so much I want to say to you, make you understand. Tell everyone I love them and I'll watch over them." She closed her eyes and gathered her strength. Angel was losing the battle with his grief. They tears he kept pushing away began to trickle out the corner of his eyes to leave trial down his pale cheeks. The hopelessness of the situation was slowly overwhelming him. His soulmate, the love of his life was lying in his arms dying and he for all his immortality could do nothing to stop it. Raising his head he stared at the sky trying to get a grip on his emotions. He felt Buffy's gentle hand on his cheek and her opened a little again. "You knew," she said. He closed and shook his head. "You knew," she insisted. "That's why you're here. It's this crazy link between us." He closed his eyes in resignation. He confirmed her knowledge. "Yeah, I knew." She locked a little lost before speaking again. " I knew to. The dream last night it was a prophecy dream." She coughed once then twice before continuing.  
  
"Angel," she said looking at him determinedly. " I love you. I've loved you and hated you at the same time, but I've always known where you were and what you were doing. You hurt, I hurt. Angel, don't hurt for me now and don't feel guilty. I love and my soul will love you forever.  
  
"I love you, Buffy," he choked, "now and forever and even after that."  
  
Buffy looked at him, panting and then placed a hand over the one he had been brushing over her hair to still it. She gazed directly at her eyes and with the last of her strength she raised up and murmured "Forever and after." As the end closed in on her she placed her lips on his and sealed the vow with a kiss.  
  
Angel kissed her back until her body became limp in his arms. Pulling back he looked into her eyes which gazed back at him sightlessly. Hoping against hope he buried his face in her neck to listen for heartbeat only to be met with silence.  
  
The silence swallowed the last of his control and with the pain and loss ripping through him he lifted his head to the heavens and called her name in agony. "Buffy!" the cry left his mouth to echo hauntingly across the cemetery. Energy spent, Angel slumped down to cradle his beloved's body in silence.  
  
Gunn crept over to the couple. For a second he hesitated then he tried to get Angel's attention. "Angel? Hey Angel man, are you alright?" Angel remained silent strangely removed from the scene. Gunn tried again this time he added a wave in front of Angel's face. Angel remained as he was still and silent his face as if it were carved in stone and his eyed fixed on some distant point on he horizon that only he could see. Just as Gunn was peering down in to look in Angel's eyes the others burst from various parts of the cemetery and surrounded the scene.  
  
Willow stepped forward tentatively. "Buffy, she whispered.  
  
Gunn stood up and looked at the group. Cordelia looked at his face and knew in her heart what had happened and with tears in her eyes she asked the question that was everyone's mind. "What happened?"  
  
He shook his head as if to clear it from the horror of the moment. Then in a quiet voice he said, "When we got here she was fighting a demon, ugly sucker," he gestured t the corpse, "we jumped in to help and we had it on its knees. Then its tail came from out of nowhere and hit her, tossed her in the air and then dropped her. In the process it stabbed her with the spikes. Angel killed it but she was bleeding so much that she only lasted a few minutes." The grief and helplessness in his eyes and is pronouncement ended the last remaining hope. Grief began to overwhelm the group as whimpers and sobs began to sound in the air and the Scooby gang began to cling to each other lifelines to their fallen leader. Giles watched over them putting his own grief in check to help them.  
  
"There's more," Gunn said quietly to Cordelia and Wesley after moving closer to them. "There's something wrong with Angel."  
  
"What," they glanced at Angel in fear and worry.  
  
"I can't get him to respond it's like he's gone; his body's here but his minds not." Gunn looked at them in sorrow.  
  
"Oh God," in a choked voice Cordelia ran to Angel and began punching and kicking him, screaming at him to get a response.  
  
The Scooby gang was distracted from their grief by the hysterical display Cordelia was presenting. Giles stepped forward as Wesley and Gunn grabbed her. "What's the matter?" he asked his attention on Cordelia rather than on Angel as the two men struggled to calm her down. Even as they started to answer Xander's gasp prevented it, "Giles, look!"  
  
Giles followed the direction his finger and looked in shock at the vampire. He hadn't moved a muscle during Cordelia's thrashing. In fact he hadn't moved since they had found him and Buffy. He sat still as stone with Buffy cradled gently in his arms; his eyes fixed on a distant horizon. Giles stepped closer to Angel and bent over to peer into his eyes. Giles quickly sprang up again in horror. The eyes he stared into were as sightless and dead as Buffy's.  
  
The others reacted t the shock on Giles' face stepped closer to the tragic pair. They froze in horror at his appearance and on the heels of horror came a deep and aching sorrow and the realization that they were things to be done.  
  
"Giles we need to call the police and tell Buffy's mom and Dawn," Willow spoke in slightly strangled tone as if she could barely get the necessary words out. Her eyes spoke of how much she hated to say the words but she knew in her heart that Buffy would them to deal with the practicalities first.  
  
Cordelia reached into her pocket and pulled out her cell phone. "Here use this," she said calmer now. She handed the phone to Giles and then remained in the circle of Gunn's arms. After studying the pair in the center of the group for a long moment she sighed deeply and asked the question that had been utmost in her mind. "Giles, what are we going to do about Angel? I mean we're not even sure that he'll let her go when the corner gets here." She looked worried. The others nodded their agreement they to were worried for in all the years they had known him they had never this stiff cold grief stricken Angel and it unnerved them.  
  
"We don't know that he won't either, Cordelia, we'll just have to cross that bridge when we come to it." Wesley answered for Giles when he was interrupted by the connection to the authorities.  
  
After explaining the situation and then listening for a few minutes, Giles hung up the phone and turned to study the group. "The authorities will be here momentarily," he said his voice neutral betraying no of the rioting emotions inside of him.  
  
"I think we better get him out of here now," breaking the silence that followed the announcement.  
  
"Anya," Xander said trying to hush her.  
  
"She's right," Tara and Spike said in unison.  
  
"NO! NO, she's not!" Willow said. To her separating the pair earlier then necessary was wrong on a basic level.  
  
"Willow," Tara said gently placing her hand on Willow's arm. Looking deep into Willow's eyes she said, "You know she's right. You can't keep them together. She's gone."  
  
"Besides," Spike interrupted, "in the condition he's in their liable to take him a long to. Then tomorrow morning while he's lying in their nice sunlit hallway waiting to be transported to the county morgue he'll burn to a crisp."  
  
"Maybe that would be better," Wesley muttered under his breath.  
  
"What," Cordelia gasped outraged the he'd say something like that.  
  
"Cordelia, Buffy died and this," he indicated Angel's silent form, " is how he copes. Can you imagine he'll cope with the rest of his eternal life without her."  
  
Cordelia opened her mouth to reply just as the first sirens filled the air.  
  
"If we're gonna do it we need to do it now." Gunn said.  
  
Everyone looked at Giles and sighing with resignation he moved to a crouch in front of Angel. "Angel," he said. "Let me have Buffy. The authorities are on their way." Reaching out he gently pries Buffy put of Angel's arms. It was surprisingly easy. The lack of fight shook Giles and he looked to the still face near his. Nothing had changed it was still pale cool marble and blank sightless eyes. He was starting to become greatly worried now. He continued talking to Angel. " Gunn and Wesley are going to take you to my place now," gesturing with his hand he motioned the two men forward. Abruptly Angel's mouth moved and the tiniest whisper came out. "It was a prophecy dream, Giles, and there was nothing I could do to stop it. It was all for nothing." Giles looked at him in shock and then as suddenly as it had started it ended leaving Giles to wonder at the strange message. The litany trailed off as Gun and Wesley hauled Angel to his feet. His expression never changed and the end of the words left Angel as stiff and silent as before. Angel allowed himself to be led away from the scene with an uncharacteristic docility to his movements. The three disappeared into the trees surrounding the cemetery as the first patrol cars arrived on the scene.  
  
1 Epilogue – Five Years Later  
  
Angel stood beside single grave in the Sunnydale Central Cemetery. The grave held only a name two dates and a short message.  
  
1.1 Buffy Anne Summers  
  
Born January 16, 1980  
  
Died February 1, 2001.  
  
We'll love you. Forever and After  
  
That had been his suggestion. He fought everyone to have it and he won. In the back of his mind he believed that the only reason he won was because they were all to happy seeing him firmly back among the living so to speak that they would have given him anything he wanted. He remembered nothing tat had occurred after Buffy collapsed lifeless in his arms or about the three weeks that followed. He did, however, remember in great detail that he had returned to himself.  
  
Three weeks to the day that Buffy died he had been sitting in a chair in the courtyard in front of Giles' apartment. Staring blankly at the wall locked in frozen state of helplessness and grief when he had felt two arms encircle his body and hug him hard. At the same time a slight weight dropped into his lap and a young voice began pleading with him to come to reality. The cocoon of numbness faded and he blinked to find himself staring into the frightened eyes of Buffy's little sister Dawn. She sat in his lap clinging to crying as if her life was over.  
  
In the background he heard Buffy's voice whisper "Take care of her for me." He brought his arms around her and cling back to her as the last of the cocoon dropped and he was pushed to reality with a hard shove and the grief enfolded him.  
  
They cried until there weren't any tears left to cry. Then clung and drew comfort from the silence of just being able to share their grief. When the silence began to lengthen Dawn began to speak quietly and fill Angel in on all that he had missed in the last three weeks. As she finished she looked Angel right in the eye and asked if he was ready to go inside and see the rest of the group. He looked right at her and then gently set her on her feet and pushed himself slowly to his feet. His legs were shaking but they held him up and together he and Dawn went inside and shocked everyone into silence.  
  
Angel shifted against the headstone and thought of all the changes that last five years had brought to the group. Xander and Anya married and have two children a boy, Michael, and a girl, Anne after Buffy. Willow and Tara haven't changed still together and still practicing Wicca. The group received periodic postcards from Spike who started traveling a month after Buffy's death and hadn't stopped in the years since. Cordelia and Gunn married a year ago and were already expecting their first child.  
  
The biggest change came in the Summers household. Three years after Buffy's death Rupert Giles and Joyce Summers married and he adopted Dawn. As his thoughts shifted again to the Buffy's sister he thought again about the reason he was at Buffy's grave that night. Today had been Dawn's eighteenth birthday Angel had spent the last five years making sure that Dawn had everything she needed in order to survive as the sister of the slayer. He had spent every day of the last five years fulfilling his promise to Buffy. He had shut down Angel Investigations and made Sunnydale his permanent home. Much to his surprise Cordelia, Gunn and Wesley had followed him to Sunnydale. With Buffy's death a new watcher and slayer were called. When there was a need the Scooby gang would help the new avengers out but for the most part the group fought evil the way they always had by themselves.  
  
As the people around him began to settle into normal lives Angel attempted to keep his contact with them to a minimum. Unfortunately, nobody would let him. The biggest offenders were Joyce Summers and Dawn and Willow. Joyce's chief complaint with him had not been with him but what he represented to her daughter and seeing the way that he had grieved for her child had softened her attitude toward him. Dawn treated him as the last link he had with Buffy and Willow who said that Buffy expected her to do this. At least Cordelia knew when to back off.  
  
He smiled faintly as he remembered the way Joyce dragged him into the family. Thinking of them made his coming actions harder and so he pushed the thoughts of surrogate family to the back of his mind and gazed across the distant land. The sun was slowly coming up and the knowledge gave him feeling of peace.  
  
"I thought I might find you here." Startled Angel whirled around towards the sound of the voice.  
  
Giles stood a few feet away watching him with unreadable eyes. "You are aware that the sun is coming up shortly," he continued in the same measured tone.  
  
Angel shrugged his shoulders in an uncomfortable motion and muttered, "Yeah."  
  
"Then hadn't you probable get inside," Giles asked steadily his eyes boring into Angel.  
  
Angel glanced at the sky; dawn would be breaking in just a matter of less than fifteen minutes. "Angel," Giles recaptured his attention. Angel glanced back and then gazed back at the sky again unwillingly to answer the question in the other man's eyes. Giles continued to stare until Angel finally sighed in frustration.  
  
"Giles, you know what I am going to do so why are you here of all people I would have thought you would be happy."  
  
"Never happy, Angel, not when what you are going to do is going to hurt so many people I call family." Giles answered. "And they will hurt, Angel, I guarantee it."  
  
"No they won't, Giles they'll have each other to clings to, and they'll accept it." Angel looked at him beseechingly as if he really needed Giles to believe it because he didn't.  
  
"Angel, if you really believe that then you are far less intelligent than I gave you credit for. You know as well as I do that you'll be missed as much now, as you'll miss all of them when it's their time. How are we to explain to Michael and Anne that their beloved Uncle Angel chose death over watching them grow up." It was constant source of puzzlement to Giles that the two children adored Angel and that he seemed to genuinely enjoy them as hard as he tried not to.  
  
Pain flashed over Angel's features and was quickly no way was he going to see that mentioning those kids weakened Angel's resolve. "They'll survive, Giles, they're to little to have any clear memories anyway." He glanced at the sky again. Another ten minutes and the sun would be up.  
  
"Bull," Giles said disgustedly, " You know they will. But I'm not going any further on that. Just what do you think this is going to do Dawn and Joyce?"  
  
Angel started to shift again and then stopped. No way was he going to let Giles weaken his resolve. "They'll be fine now they have you and they have each other." Angel refused to believe any differently.  
  
"Can you answer me one question? Why? Why this and Why now?" Giles asked  
  
"I fulfilled my promise to Buffy. I made sure Dawn made it t an age where she can take care of herself. And now I just want to be with her."  
  
Giles raised an eyebrow. "Well, that's certainly selfish."  
  
Angel resisted the urge to shift again. This conversation was going nowhere fast and now he just wanted it over. It, being everything from the conversation to his very existence. He met Giles' eyes and said, "Yeah, I guess it is. It's just that…" he trailed off.  
  
"It just what, Angel, what is so horrible that you want to die?" Giles asked in disgust. Although Angel wasn't one of his favorite people he hated a wasted life.  
  
This time Angel did shift but in frustration rather then embarrassment as he tried to explain the hollowness inside. He waited a long moment then said absently as if he was talking to himself; "It doesn't stop. You think if you just hold out one more year the pain will stop but it never does. Everyone around you is moving on, starting families and you try to step back in order to keep them safe and maybe yourself to. They don't let you and you stay with them and watch their children grow and all the time a piece of you is missing and you can't remember what that piece is anymore. And you realize your life has never been more empty." Now he looked at Giles. "Is that you wanted to here? How since the day Buffy died a piece of me died and with everyone around me pairing off I realized how totally alone I am and will always be." Suddenly he dropped his in defeat, "You know what the saddest part is Giles and doesn't even me make me sad anymore just tired and useless."  
  
During the longest he had ever heard Angel utter, Giles remained quiet but his were searching and what he saw confirmed the speech. It was as he expected Angel had given up on life because for him the end was no closer then it ever was. Giles remembered reading that due to their immortal lives vampires also had long memories. But one part of the speech however had pricked his attention. "Useless, how?"  
  
Angel shifted and cursed his suddenly spry tongue. Nobody but Cordelia and the long gone Doyle knew about the forgotten day and until right this minute he has intended to keep it that way. He knew that he would finally have to tell Giles but first he would see if he could distract him. "The dream, Giles, I had a dream the night before Buffy died and there was nothing I could do to save her. Nothing at all even though I knew." He made a slashing movement with his hand.  
  
"No there wasn't but Angel we've talked about this and we've come to the conclusion that you weren't meant to help." Giles studied him again and then said, "There's something else isn't there."  
  
Angel jerked his shoulder and gave in. " The year I moved to LA when I came back to help Buffy on Thanksgiving and then she came to have it out with me in," Giles nodded in encouragement and after a moment Angel continued, "we were attacked by a Mohra demon and it got away, so we tracked it separately and when I found it we fought and I killed but some of his blood mixed with mine and I became human." He looked at Giles intently. "The first thing I did was go and find Buffy. We spent all of that day and night together, like real people." He closed his eyes briefly as the pain of what would never be waved through him.  
  
Giles eyes widened briefly and then he said, "Why didn't Buffy ever tell anybody?" Knowing in his heart that had something happened Buffy would never have come that year. "I mean she definitely have told Will-"  
  
Angel shook his head. "She didn't remember." This time the pain was a stronger wave through him. Giles looked confused. " The Mohra demon rejuvenated himself to and I went to fight him myself but Buffy had to bail me out. I went back to the Powers that be and they told me that Buffy would die without me there to back her at the end of Days. So I asked them to change me back and to do this they turned the day back. Nobody but me remembered the missing day. Later I told Doyle and Cordelia."  
  
"Angel-" Giles began.  
  
Angel glanced at the sky again. Less then five minutes now. All of a sudden Giles snaked out and grabbed Angel's then Giles turned and attempted to drag Angel to his car. He too knew how much was left. "Let's talk some more in the car." He said tugging hard.  
  
Angel opened his mouth to reply when two things happened. The sun started to burn his skin and willow's voice yelled Giles' name, distracting him. He turned to see the whole group in a wide circle around them.  
  
Feeling the flames begin to lick greedily at his body in earnest, Angel shoved Giles away from him and began searching for Buffy. He knew in his heart that she would be there waiting for him. He smiled into the empty space as the cries of the others filled the air because he felt her hand take his. The pain began to rack his entire body but he smiled even brighter and said to her, "I love you."  
  
"Forever and after," she replied. The pain abruptly stopped as he floated towards her oblivious to the cries, which had become wails of dismay and grief, from the others around them. He was finally home.  
  
The group surged forward to help Giles stand as Angel burst into flames and then finally into ash, which rained liked tears on their heads. In the stunned and grief stricken silence that followed there were a granted a last image of he two lovers walking entwined together in the sunlight. Love glowing around them. Watching the two move into the sunrise like two old fashioned heroes Dawn whispered, "Forever and after."  
  
"What?" Xander asked confused.  
  
The pain still clutching along had eased slightly at the image of her sister and her true love so that Dawn could smile faintly. Her voice wistful and sad she said, " Oh, something Angel once told me," the looks grew more confused, so her voice a little stronger she explained, " We were talking about how he and Buffy never seemed to get together and he said they would eventually and I asked him how he knew and he looked me right in the eye smiled faintly and said 'Because our love will last for forever and after'."  
  
"I guess that says it all," Willow whispered. Glancing at each other and then back at the place where the couple had disappeared they acknowledged the truth of the statement.  
  
The End 


End file.
